3rd Eye Awakening: Portal to God

Yogananda, Sat-chit-ananda, 3rd Eye-Ajna Chakra-DMT-Portal to God

The inner peace first experienced by the devotee in meditation is his own soul; the vaster peace he feels by going deeper is God. –Paramahansa Yogananda

Recognizing our body, personality, temperament, preferences, beliefs, values, opinions, thought patterns, feelings, perceptions, likes, dislikes, memories, history and every idea we were ever taught about ourselves is NOT WHO WE ARE is difficult, to say the least. The mind does not let go without a battle. Ego backlashes occur every step of the way. Thankfully, with devotion and surrender, the Self rewards us with continuous, positive incentives to keep us moving inward. Here is an example from today’s journal entry:  

Before falling asleep last night, I re-watched the movie Awake, a moving story about Paramahansa Yogananda’s life. As an SRF (Self-Realization Fellowship) student, Yogananda has been gracing my nigttime dreams with his presence. Re-watching this film strengthend my commitment to his teachings and to serving others ready for Self-Realization. I fell into a light sleep renewing my vows to provide awakened-service. Each time I awoke during the night I heard “Sat-chit-ananda,” then fell back asleep.

Around 5 a.m. I was wide awake and though I wanted to get more sleep I heard “Don’t sleep, meditate!” I laid on my back and felt the familiar movement of energy between the brows. The past 48 hours this momentum had been especially strong. Most of yesterday, even though I had a lot to do, I felt as though I was on a partial magic mushroom trip, something I hadn’t experienced in more than 25 years. But meditation—especially meditating during the middle of the night—intensifies this energy. Yesterday, all I wanted to do was sit in a state of bliss and do nothing, which is not like my usual, highly active self. Perhaps this was the soul’s way of making me “be still and know God.”  

When the 3rd eye (ajna chakra) is highly activated, I am learning the neurobiology of spiritual awakening and how the pineal gland trickles DMT (or N-dimethyltryptamine, in medical talk) which increases serotonin. This is reflected in Matthew 6:22 it states: “The light of the body is the eye: if therefore thine eye be single, thy whole body shall be full of light.”

As the non-painful pressure increased between my brows, it felt like something was trying to open. But what? Since I am preparing to sell our house, just resting in this serotonin-induced-euphoric state yesterday was not an option. A photographer needed to take pictures, the realtor wanted information on pricing, signing online documents, etc. Yet at 5 a.m., the inner eye force was so potent I had to close my eyes and turn my attention away from meaningless thoughts and into this inner realm. As I paid close attention to the phenomena in the blackness, I noticed small, wispy light patterns dancing against the backdrop. These were familiar and usually morphed into fractals. However, this time, as I looked very closely at them, I began to see a “portal.” It was so subtle I could hardly see it. But the more I attuned my focus to this opening, the inner pressure began to dissolve. For the first time in two days, there was no more pressure, just a barely perceptible black doorway that led to…where? Cosmic Consciousness? Gateway to God? I had no idea. I still don’t. It seemed this wormhole led somewhere greater than I have ever known and went on forever. My consciousness expanded beyond the bedroom, city, state, country, world, then up into the sun, moon, and stars—the entire galaxy. But then the journey ended. When people question How can I tell I’m not my body? I suggest they expand their consciousness as far as possible. Your awareness can travel millions of miles and more while your body stays put.   Before falling back to sleep, I knew this was a turning point in my awakening. Perhaps it was revealing the true meaning of Sat-chit-ananda: Ultimate Reality (sat), Consciousness (chit), pure Bliss (ananda). For in our deepest states of meditation, this is our experience of Who and What we truly are. Now if I only could sustain this awareness when not meditating.…

All love to you. All grace to you.

An Intimate Portrait of Awakening

An Intimate Portrait of Awakening

Hello dear Friend.

It has been a long while since I wrote an article, or done anything “in the world,” so to speak. Months ago, Kundalini Shakti was unexpectedly activated and began altering my inner landscapes and neurophysiology. Spiritual expansion has been my soul path the past 30 years (except for a few detours!), but this type of awakening was not invited or even considered. Some days my meditations reveal a state of bliss so intense that my intellect goes off-line, making it difficult to communicate for hours or even days. Other times, my nervous system is recalibrating in ways that I can hardly tolerate ordinary noises and Nature becomes my only haven. Except for counseling clients and spending special, limited time with my beloved Thomas and fur angel, Mia, life has been immersed in intense sadhana (spiritual practice): meditation, contemplative prayer, journaling, self-inquiry, and Advaita Vedanta and Bhakti Yoga teachings. Only now does it feel like the right time to share this highly personal story of awakening with others. Actually, “awakening” is not a journey but a profound undoing; undoing the attachment to the beliefs that we are the “doer,” the “experiencer,” the “reactor,” the “thinker,” the “personality,” the “body” and so forth.

You may be on this mailing list because you signed up for articles on nighttime dreams. Since dreams continue to be an integral part of awakening, I am recording them and will use them to illustrate their significance. But the focus will remain on waking up from your false self and living from the reverence of the true Self. This divine aspect lies hidden beneath the thoughts, feelings, and beliefs about what we believe we are. If this is not of interest to you, please unsubscribe using either the iContact or WordPress unsubscribe link.

If this resonates with your soul, you are invited to participate in my non-dualistic journey that feels precarious at times since there is no teacher, guru, or organized path. Though I am not an expert—only someone who is willing to be vulnerable and expose her experiences—authentic insights from my personal journal about daily life during awakening will be shared. Stages of awakening will be high-lighted, perhaps stages you are currently experiencing. And yes, there are stages. We may even fall back to sleep if we have not dealt with the seeds of our vasanas (behavioral tendencies) and our vrittis (thought patterns).

This is not an easy road to travel. Yet there really is no journey, no road, nor even a traveler. Very few people are even remotely interested. Thus, if you possess even the tiniest glimmer of curiosity, know that your Self is already coaxing you Home. Lasting inner peace, deep contentment, and periods of pure bliss are likely to shine forth as you learn to view everything through the eyes of pure awareness. Why? Because true awakening is the recognition of the Self which resides within you. Never having been born, It never dies.

From my journal…

This morning’s meditation felt like I was being resurrected. As the intense Kundalini was rising throughout my being, I communed with God as never before. Though it was not the showering of Grace I felt a couple of weeks ago, it was very gentle yet powerful. “Surrender” kept surfacing and the more I let go, the higher I felt lifted into stunning levels of golden, white light. About an hour in (not sure), I witnessed a golden orb gently pulsating and communicating its love to me. It was quite profound. I seemed to stop breathing. Gasps for air escaped my body. I kept my focus single pointed as waves of Kundalini surged through the body. As the focus intensified, I felt unafraid of the ascension and immense energy pulsating up my spine and out through the top of my head.

At one point, I felt a significant shift into the Divine and my hands went cold and stiff. They began to sweat a little. In the past, I would have felt more hesitation/fear but today, I was COMPLETELY open and with each deepening surrender, I was lifted higher. Afterward, I had to lie down. Warm waves of peace washed over me and I felt profoundly content.

How did this happen after feeling so disconnected from Source just yesterday?! An answer emerged: GRACE.